Tuesday, September 25, 2012

"I wake up and feel empty. Shit makes you wanna squeeze a glock 'til it's empty. In already standing on the edge, so don't tip me"
i kind of feel like i'm being taken for granted...
i'm tired of being a victim, i'm tired of struggling to find happiness in things i do, i'm tired of being tired


Sunday, September 23, 2012

everyone expects so much from me

my family expects me to be there for them at all times, spend time with them, and be the man of the house

my friends expect me to keep contact with them and to visit them

i can't please everyone. i'm trying to do what makes me happy

i love spending time with my woman. she's the only one that really gets me

i feel so overwhelmed all the time. i'm just so tired. i toss and turn at night struggling to fall asleep. and when i do, my alarm wakes me up and i feel so exhausted

can i just go to sleep?

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

I'm just so tired. Why do I work myself so hard? I can hear my dad's voice in my head all the time, pushing me to work harder and harder.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

i need to get back to lifting again. i can't gain any weight this school year
"in the end, life and love aren't about what IFs, they are about what IS. Mike, nobody can change the past, just gotta keep that head up"

spoken by a true friend :)
And with words unspoken
A silent devotion
I know you know what i mean
And the end is unknown
But i think i’m ready
As long as you’re with me

i guess in the end, we all perish. victims of our biological time clocks. everyday they tick down until that fateful day. muscles grow and atrophy, youth comes and goes. life is the most precious and fragile thing.

i wish my dad had fought harder. for himself. he sacrificed his own life for that of his children, and that is the greatest miracle i could ever ask for
i was thinking today about how ephemeral life is. i need to live a full of meaningful memories, of little regrets. why did i care so much in the past about certain things? even more recently, why did i fret during last semester about everything imaginable? my anxiety through the roof. sometimes i can't sleep at night. haunted by past and present occurrences. i guess my path to happiness involves making those around me happy. that's how i take care of myself. by providing those around me with tools to live better lives. i believe everyone is fundamentally moral

Monday, September 3, 2012

I try to live my life devoid of sin, in the purest way possible. Because in the end, I want to live a life I am proud of

Saturday, September 1, 2012

I really wish I had more control over my own life
In general, I don't deal well with anyone's bullshit. If I feel like I am wronged, I because really standoffish and introverted
If you live your life trying to please everyone else, you'll be the unhappiness person who ever walked the earth